I pray for weird things maybe…

Four times in the last few years I have heard the words, “You saved my life”.

Those four words brought a mix of emotions.

For the longest time I believed I wasn’t enough to save a life.

I tried once.

I failed.

At least that’s how I viewed it for a long time – as a failure on my end.

I’ve done a lot of reflection and soul searching on that experience.

Can we save people?

I’m not sure it’s black and white, but what it is… is a heavy topic and a loaded question.

I am able to look back on my life and know exactly which individuals threw me a flotation device when I needed one. Does that mean they saved my life or were they merely in the right time, at the right place, with the right words?

Were they a vessel?

I wonder if I could tell them that I wasn’t trying to save their lives. I didn’t know their lives needed saving. And honestly I don’t know how to save a life. I’m good, but I’m not that good. I learned this a long time ago, but that is a story for another day.

I do know that I met them where they were – even in the darkest of places.

I sat with them as long as they needed.

I wonder if they would be surprised to learn that hearing those words brought me humbly to my knees.

For a very long time, I have prayed.

I pray for weird things maybe.

I pray that I am always in the right place, at the right time, with the right words.

The ‘right place’, ‘right time’, and ‘right words’ are without a doubt questionable and can be debated from a million different perspectives. And yet, it is neither here nor there, because in the end, if a life was saved – a life was saved – period.

Most of these conversations took place over the telephone.

If you ever read the day I got the call, you may find irony in the telephone life-saving-scenario.

I was at a loss at a very challenging moment in my life. I had no idea what to do. I was on auto-pilot big time.  A miracle occurred at the precise moment when I felt like I was drowning. I received a phone call. She didn’t take me out of the water, but she threw me a flotation device.

I will never be a savior, but I hope that I will always be in the right place, at the right time, with the right words. I hope that I am given the opportunity to throw a flotation device. And if given that opportunity, I will throw with all the strength that flows within me.

 

© LifeasChristine, 2016. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to LifeasChristine with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

 

 

 

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