“Live life with no regrets”
That asinine quote has taken over the internet. There are articles upon articles instructing one how to live a life with no regrets, how to die without regret.
You know who lives life without regrets?
Narcissists and sociopaths.
There is a big difference between wallowing in regret, understanding one’s regrets, and having no regrets.
In order to regret anything, one must reflect to some extent.
And I get it, not everyone reflects. Not everyone can look in the mirror.
To take a good, long, hard look at one’s life and truly acknowledge regrets requires honesty with oneself.
If one cannot be honest with oneself, how then, can they be honest with others?
Mull that over for a while.
Our regrets are very personal to each of us. They tell a story, there is often a lesson, and there is often change involved – not always, but often.
There is a reason for regret, yet too few understand this.
One of the questions I often ask people, when I’ve passed the pleasantries stage, is if they ever regretted anything. I don’t expect details or stories. Though stories should be shared, because it’s how we learn from each other, but I get it, some are not sharers.
You know those people that say, “Nope, no regrets here. I live life with no regrets.”
It is almost immediate… I close up shop. I don’t trust those with no regrets.
Do you know why?
Because there is no human that has ever lived a perfect life. There is no one that ever made every right choice or did not hurt another human being.
Regrets require a process in order to have any ‘learning’ come from it.
We have to be able, in the quiet corners of our self, know our regrets.
Growing as a person comes when we understand what they are and why.
Growth leads to change.
Knowing our regrets is not to imprison us, but to free us.
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